This one's kind of lengthy but it's what's to be expected since I'm just rambling transparently about what's been going on the last couple months.
It's been quite a while since I've posted anything up on my blog and to be quite frank with you, I have just been lazy in the creative aspect to brain storm ideas about what I want to post on this blog as well as TheMindUp's page. I had so many ideas during the school year, a time where I shouldn't be thinking about this blog as much but It just seems like all my good ideas have just dissolved and I'm in a phase where I'm stuck. Hopefully, this funk ends soon though..
My summer break is 4 months long, and 2 have already passed leaving me feeling kind of sad that I haven't really done anything with my summer except work. Not a horrible thing though, I feel really comfortable in my work environment since it's a place I'm extremely familiar with and the money is definitely well needed especially with the school year approaching in September.
On the topic of school, for the whole month of May and the first couple of weeks of June were brutal. I was in the process of waiting for either my acceptance or rejection letters for the faculties/programs I applied to. So I was glued to my phone 24/7, waiting for some sort of email or notification saying I got into at least 1/2 programs I applied into. For those who don't know, I spent the first two years of university trying to fulfill my pre-requisites for both nursing and respiratory therapy, since I wasn't quite sure what I wanted for my future and my career. I went into university initially wanting to do nursing, but then was introduced to respiratory therapy and that seemed interesting, but then I even thought about Medicine for a brief moment. But then was turned off by the amount of effort I already exerted into pre-requisites for nursing which coincidentally, because of my elective choices, were used for RT as well. So that's how I decided which programs I wanted to enrol in. Nursing being my top choice, and if I didn't get into nursing, I was hopeful I would get into the respiratory therapy program.
Mid May, I got an email saying a decision about one of my applications had been evaluated and unfortunately, because of a stupid grade I got in STATISTICS (f*** that class), my application to the RT program was rejected. You could imagine how anxious I was at this point. If the faculty that originally was considered to be my back up plan didn't want me, what were my chances of me getting into nursing. To get into nursing, it's a pretty competitive field to begin with (like most programs, of course). It just felt like all my peers were my competition, and from what I heard, they were all doing WAY better than I was academically. I'm not joking when I say that it felt like EVERYBODY I knew wanted to be a nurse and were all pretty confident about getting in. At this point, I already concluded that I probably wasn't going to get in since my GPA seemed kind of average, and not good enough for the standards to get in. So I was already trying to think of other options like possibly changing my career path altogether or giving it another year to try again in hopes that I would get accepted for the winter intake or if anything, the next fall intake.
Thankfully, sometime in June while I was hanging out with Billy, I got an email saying that my other application had been reviewed and that a decision was made based upon it. Since RT was a bust, it only made sense that, that decision wasn't RT changing it's mind about me, but was the letter for my nursing application. And, with that being said - I GOT IN AND START IN SEPTEMBER! PHEW. I screamed and cried and was literally a mess, haha. I know I know, I seem so dramatic and everyone in school usually goes through something similar. But for me, it was like this huge weight off my shoulders since it was confirmation that I made the right choice and was where I was supposed to be. It's obviously still a long way to go, and I still have other trials to beat up first but hey, my state of emotions and state of life right now can be defined as happy and content and that's good enough for me.
On another note,
I've been really trying to get into the groove of things that I used to once love, but since then disappeared out of my life.
I started working out more seriously the last couple weeks, and I'm not saying that I loved working out about before - but I've always been active since I danced my whole life but since giving that up 2-3 years ago, I haven't loved physical activity since. So, for the better of me, I've been really trying to motivate myself to live a better lifestyle and give exercise a go since it'll be good for me both mentally and physically in the long run.
I've also tried to be more in touch with myself by spending more time both reading and writing. I've read probably two books that weren't textbooks fully, in the last year and really enjoyed it. But always saw that I would refrain starting another one right after since exams feel like they never end in the school year and instead of reading, I could be spending my time studying to benefit my academics. Hopefully I can push myself to read 2-3 books over the next couple of weeks and possibly even make a Summer Reads blog post about it at the end of summer!
Well, I guess that's it for now. You're pretty much caught up with major events happening and to wrap it up - I'm extremely thrilled to see what the next couple of weeks of summer has in store for me. It's been quite a journey, especially emotionally, since school ended but I'd like to think i'm doing good. Or at least, in times where I feel kind of down, I'm better at finding ways to make myself feel better again rather than just sulking in bed, watching youtube videos of Chad Michael Murray playing Austin Ames in A Cinderella Story, over and over again to cheer me up. That alone shows personal growth, I think. 😂
Keep a look out for a couple more blog posts in the upcoming weeks and months!
Thanks for helping me turn these new pages,